With Great Chick Magnetism Comes Great Responsibility In The Darkness’ New Single “All The Pretty Girls”

The struggles you face when exuding rockstar pheromones.

Photo: Courtesy of Wilful Publicity

British quartet, The Darkness, paints the struggles of handling their rockstar sex appeal in their fresh single “All The Pretty Girls” where their award-winning and platinum-selling status draws the attention of gazillion women (and their mothers). Granted, this is beyond #FirstWorldProblems…this is #RockstarProblems that none of us plebeians who spend one-third of our days swiping with the hopes of finding a potential mate can relate. Buuuuut jealousy aside, it is a rock banger that packs humor and sways you within the firing percussions. Stream below:

“All The Pretty Girls” is from The Darkness’ upcoming fifth album Pinewood Smile, which will be out on October 6th. Regarding the new album and the relevance of The Darkness’ status in 2017, Justin Hawkins (the dude who sings) commented the following:

“Why should anybody care? Because if you don’t, we’re fucked!! History will remember us as the apathetic generation who negligently ushered in a dreadful dystopian age that may or may not come to be known as ‘The Rise of the Arseclowns’. We cannot allow this to continue! You may not give a shit about Brexit or Trump, but PLEASE… give a shit about The Darkness otherwise the last bastion of cultural sensibility will fall and our airwaves will be polluted by meaningless pop purveyed by arseholes and morons… Oh wait!”

For those of you who have been untouched by The Darkness sex appeal (a euphemism for Darkness-virgins), these cronies started rocking together since 2000 and became an overnight sensation with their 2003 debut record Permission To Land, which went 5x Platinum and sold more than 1.5 million copies in the UK. A documentary regarding The Darkness’ comeback will be released in 2018, so if you are too lazy to read Wikipedia, you can watch the documentary next year. They will start hitting stages in the fall:

Europe 2017 tour

8/4 – Skogsröjet (Rejmyre, Sweden)

8/27 – Rock the City (Bucharest, Romania)

10/13 – Dolans Warehouse (Limerick City, Ireland)

10/14 – The Academy (Dublin, Ireland)

10/15 – The Limelight (Belfast, UK)

11/3 – Razzmatazz 2 (Barcelona, Spain)

11/4 – Ochoymedio (Madrid, Spain)

11/5 – Kafe Antzokia (Bilbao, Spain)

11/8 – Alcatraz (Milan, Italy)

11/9 – Orion (Ciampino, Italy)

11/10 – Vox Club (Nonantola, Italy)

11/12 – Simm City Festsaal Zentrum Simmering (Vienna, Austria)

11/13 – Technikum (Munchen, Germany)

11/14 – Columbia Theater (Berlin, Germany)

11/16 – Matrix (Bochum, Germany)

11/19 – Le Trabendo (Paris, France)

11/20 – Z7 Konzertfabrik (Pratteln, Switzerland)

11/23 – O2 Guildhall Southampton (Southampton, UK)

11/24 – Manchester Academy (Manchester, UK)

11/25 – King George’s Hall (Blackburn, UK)

11/27 – O2 Academy Leeds (Leeds, UK)

11/28 – O2 Academy Newcastle (Newcastle Upon Tyne, UK)

11/29 – O2 Academy Glasgow (Glasgow, UK)

12/1 – Victoria Hal (Stoke On Trent, UK)

12/2 – Rock City (Nottingham, UK)

12/3 – Norwich Nick Rayns LCR UEA (Norwich, UK)

12/5 – G Live Guildford (Guildford, UK)

12/6 – Margate Winter Gardens (Margate (UK)

12/7 – Southend Cliffs Pavilion (Westcliff On Sea, UK)

12/9 – O2 Academy Birmingham (Birmingham, UK)

12/10 – Eventim Apollo (London, UK)

12/11 – Brighton Dome (Brighton, UK)

12/13 – St David’s Hall (Cardiff, UK)

12/14 – Colston Hall (Bristol, UK)